Lately, I’ve been testing out a more ‘Krauser’ style of game.
I realised that I was performing like a ‘nice guy’ and therefore positioning myself as a boyfriend and not an ‘alpha sport fuck’, ‘fuck buddy’ or ‘harem leader’.
I have encountered some problems with my ‘sport fuck transition’ and want to break two of them down for you:
On hearing about the ‘alpha sport fuck’, I went straight into my dates with sexual eyes, heavy touching/contact and trying to kiss. I over escalated on the girl and almost burnt the interaction.
It was cool to be able to get so sexual so fast, but it didn’t do me any favours.
I understood that every girl has a pace at which she feels comfortable. If she feels that you’re going ‘super-fast’ then tension between you and her is going to break – like the wire on a fishing rod.
Mystery was almost right when he said; one step forward – two steps back. I believe this is sexual fractionation. You escalate heavily – and then relax. It’s pull – push. It’s not the shape of a slope, it’s the shape of a staircase – step and relax, step and relax.
I’m great at getting into deep rapport with a girl. It was one of my favourite things to do.
But this style of conversation – in which you discuss feelings, ambitions and passions – is seriously orientated towards a boyfriend/girlfriend type of relationship. It seems to make her much more comfortable with you, and slow down her pace. [I’d leave this conversation until after sex].
Because I was so used to opening girls up like flowers, I had troubles in finding things to discuss.
So here’s what I tried, to avoid the ‘boyfriend-girlfriend passion discussion’ :
- Joking and Teasing
I tried filling the conversation up with jokes, teases and humour. But many girls I over-cooked. The teasing pushes them too far and they get annoyed, angry and start feeling low. Jokes are best used as a spike. Otherwise you’ll create a low mood.
- Politics And News
I tried talking about events and what’s happening locally. But most girls aren’t interested in politics and news. Some girls will ask your opinion, but usually it’s so they can use it as an example of how to think. [If people respect you, they’ll take your opinion as their own.]
So the problem?
I tried discussing people – asking questions about her family and friends and it’s a nice topic to follow for a while. But too much of it becomes odd and very railed. I tried pointing out people we walked past on the street; “What do you think of his hat?”, “Hey, look at the dog!”, and “That guy is a fucking weirdo…Ha!”
It’s a nice thing to do, but too much of it becomes exhausting.
Then I stumbled upon a thought; that I was trying to be ‘one person’ in every interaction and trying to define myself by what I enjoyed talking about. I.e. That’s Calum – he knows about politics.
How stupid have I been thinking?
Upon realising that it’s possible to be more than five people in one, I understood that I can talk about everything which girls love; music, art, comedy, films, food and more.
It’s possible to switch from “artist” to “musician” in one conversation. Or from “food enthusiast” to “comedian” and then half an hour later you become the “writer” or “philosopher”.
Always being interested, never running out of things to say and completely avoiding a discussion about her “passions, feelings and ambitions” which is boyfriend territory!
Note: Another bonus of discussing these various basic topics is that they lead to easy suggestions for new dates – “What food do you like?” – Can lead to “I’ll cook that for you sometime.”