Conversation: How To Make Yours Incredible

conversation
Before Sunrise

Have you ever spoken to a new person and then suddenly encountered a big bubble of awkward silence?

If you answered yes, then this post is for you.

How To Spice Up My Conversations?

Firstly, you can use the massive power of assumptions. To put it simply, an assumption is a guess, presumption or speculation.

They look like this:

“I guess that you like rock music.”

“I imagine you’re probably a patient person.”

If you the verbs, “guess,” and “imagine,” you’ll immediately see an increase in the awesomeness of your conversations.

Note: If you throw these out randomly, you’ll need to further explain your choice. “I guess because you’re wearing a leather jacket and you’ve got tattoos. Am I right?”

A better tactic to use is when you listen and then assume. It looks like this:

“I’m a lawyer.”

“I guess that’s quite tough work! I imagine that you need to communicate with people a lot.”

How To Escape A Conversation Lull?

Secondly, you can use the majestic power of questions. You’ll want to listen very carefully to your conversation partner, decide what you’re interested or confused about, and then ask a question based on your curiosity.

This way, you’ll get to sit back and listen while your partner does the work to continue the conversation. It’s very fun.

Try and spice up your questions and think outside the box:

“I’m a lawyer.”

“Did you always want to be a lawyer?”

Note: to get yourself out of a lull. Remember a point your partner made from earlier and make a new question.

“So you’re a lawyer. I wonder… was it tough to get through university?”

How To Have Endless Conversations?

Finally, you can be incredible by combining these techniques to create what I call the Assumption Question Spiral.

This is a conversation pattern which creates space for your own personal value while it simultaneously encourages your partner to speak. Needless to say, it works wonders.

Here’s what it looks like:

“I’m a lawyer.”

“I imagine that’s really hard work, but you must feel proud having such an interesting job. Are you always about on big court cases like I see on TV?”

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In conclusion, you can add spice to your conversations by using cleverly timed assumptions. You can also get through a conversation dip by making a question about something your partner said earlier.

And if you need to get the conversation snowball rolling, you can use the Assumption Question Spiral to move from social awkwardness to social mastery.

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If you’ve any questions, email me at calumtingham@gmail.com

My best regards,

C

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