How did you get into that situation with your girl? Did you start open or move to that position after a while? – Mr. X. Anonymous
How Do You Begin An Open Relationship?
I recommend starting from a brand new relationship.
One successful way to do it, would be to keep dating the girl while not mentioning a relationship. For as long as she continues to say nothing, you can be seeing other girls and that’s acceptable. Until she asks, “so… err… where is this going?” At that point you can tell her, “I’m not looking for anything serious, but I’m really enjoying dating you, can we keep it like this?”
Some time later, she might ask again about the relationship. At this point, you can make the suggestion, “Well, what about an open relationship?” She might say yes straight away, or she might be a little hesitant.
You have to remain insouciant and say, “I’m not willing to go all in, but I’m happy to call you my girlfriend, and spend my time with you, I just need to know I have the freedom to see other girls, otherwise I’ll feel so trapped with you.”
Afterwards, she’ll probably agree. Oh, and by the way, if she asks you – then yes, it’s totally okay for her to see other guys. And you must be okay with that, too! There can be no hypocrisy here.
How Do You Open An Existing Relationship?
In the case that you’re already in a relationship, it may not be easy to change it into an open relationship. The structure has already been built, therefore, it’s tricky to rebuild it.
However, what you can do, is suggest a break. And assuming the girl doesn’t want to break up with you, this will throw her off balance. When she asks you why, you can respond, “I’m feeling too trapped, too caged, and I want some freedom back.”
After some time, you can suggest an open relationship.
This time, it will seem like a better option because it moves forward from breaking up, to something more secure. It’s similar to when a company raises their prices to an extreme amount, and then lowers them to a price above the original amount. There’s less complaints about the rise in price, because customers are thinking, “well, at least it’s not as high as it was…”
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I see pride, I see power, I see a badass mother who won’t take crap from nobody! – Cool Runnings